Tom, my younger brother, was born September 12, 1952 in Spur, Texas. Dr P.C. Nichols delivered Tom at the Nichols Hospital that is no longer there. It was torn down some years later. The only part that is left are the steps. Jenk has a picture of where it used to set. On his birth certificate it says Tommie Garrett Stephenson when in fact, it should say Tommy Garrett Stephenson. Lots of mistakes were made on birth certificates years ago, Mom never had it changed because it cost money to change it and we didn’t have it. We all knew his name and that was good enough for us. Tom did not like his name (Tommie) and I didn’t blame him. He just wanted to be called Tom and that’s what we called him.
Tom was 2 years younger than me and he was very unique in his own way. He always told the truth even if it got him into trouble. I remember once when we were little, we had to walk to school. This is when we were living on 3011 30 th street in Lubbock, Texas. On our way to school, Roscoe Wilson, we always passed a house that had a yard gate with a bell. We would ring that bell and run as fast as we could and never got caught until Tom and I got mad at each other. I told something to Mom and Daddy on Tom and I had forgotten about that bell. Well, Tom never forgot. Daddy marched us down the street to that house and made us ring the bell and when the lady came down to answer, we had to apologize. I remember that lady saying it was ok, lots of kids ring it on their way to school. My Dad assured her we would not be ringing it anymore, and we never did. We didn’t get a spanking, we just had to endure the embarrassment. Another incident is when we were still living at 3011 30 th street, Tom found some matches and lit the curtains in one of the bedrooms. He came running to tell Mom that there was a fire. Daddy grabbed the curtains off the window and ran to the bathroom to put them in the bath tub. He turned on the water and put the fire out. Mom asked why he did that - Tom said he just wanted to see if they would burn. He did not get a spanking, just a scolding. Another time, was when Mom couldn’t find Tom. She looked everywhere – outside, in all the rooms, the closets and couldn’t find him and Baby Roe said Mom was crying and upset. Suddenly they heard a whistle and Tom had crawled way back in the closet and was blowing in a coke bottle. Mom was so relieved, but was not happy with Tom hiding from her. Tom thought it was funny, but he never did that again.
Jenk, Linda, Tom and I all grew up in McAdoo, Texas. Henry and David never lived at McAdoo. Tom and I always took turns riding our only tricycle around in the kitchen in circles. Mom would get mad at us cause we were always hitting the ice box with the tricycle handle, We didn’t have any other place to ride it, so we just kept doing it. I’m sure Mom scolded us numerous times. Tom and I played outside along with Joe Nathan who lived down the road at McAdoo. We were at Uncle Nath’s house many times. So we played many games outside, not like the kids today; Kids today don’t know how to play games and entertain themselves outside. Today, they play games on the computer, Play Station, Xbox, their Iphones, and I don’t know what else is out there. But they play these games and never move from their chair or their bedroom. They play for hours. Doctors say this is one reason why many kids are over weight. It’s also causing muscle spasms in their hands, neck pain, and social withdrawl. As kids, we were never overweight, cause we were always outside making up games, running, and competing in different games. I remember at McAddo, Joe , Tom, and I would push each other in a wheel barrel to the edge of an old dug out cellar, that was never finished, and dumped each other over the side. I don’t know why that was so much fun, but we sure laughed.
Another memory of Tom was at McAddo when Tom got hurt. He was about 4 years old; Daddy and Uncle Charlie were butchering a hog that was hanging up high on a scaffle. I think Jenk was out there, I can’t remember. Tom was outside watching and Linda and I were in the house feeling sorry for the hog. I heard the shot (Uncle Charlie shot it) even though I covered my ears. I just couldn’t watch. It had been awhile and Uncle Charlie come running in the house carrying Tom. Tom was just as lifeless as he could be. He was not breathing. Mom was panicking. Aunt Grace, Uncle Charlie’s wife, grabbed Tom and began jostling him around and raising his arms. Finely, Tom let out a cry, but he couldn’t move his legs. The scaffle had fallen across his legs and the lower part of his hips. Tom cried a long time and wanted to go to sleep. Mom had always heard never let anyone go to sleep after being severely hurt.
Mom walked the floor holding Tom trying to keep him awake. I don’t know how many hours passed but Tom finely went to sleep, but Mom checked on him all through the night. It took a few days or weeks before he could walk. Mom and Daddy never took him to the doctor. No money.
Tom loved to read. He would read anything he could. Teacher was always telling Tom to put his library book away. His favorite magazine was reading Popular Mechanics. It was a magazine about science, new technology, and inventions. I remember when Tom would read, he got real close to the magazine or book. Mom and Daddy found out later that Tom could not see. When we got a tv he would sit very close and Mom would tell him to scoot back. Tom would take his two thumbs and index fingers and make a tiny little opening so he could look through it. He said by doing this he could see better. Apparently, that helped him to watch tv. The teacher at school put Tom at the front of the room to see the blackboard. Tom finally got glasses, and they were very thick lens.
Tom was a very good brother and I wouldn’t want him to be any different. He was always having bad luck, but he kept going. We were riding the school bus at Swenson, Texas going home. Riding the bus through the country roads and pasture roads were very rough and bumpy. Tom always had a habit of sticking his tongue out at different times. Riding on the bus was one of those times. Tom was resting his head on the bar that went across the seat and we hit a bump. His two front teeth bit right through his tongue, but he never cried out. He was quiet the rest of the way home. When we got home, he finally told Mom what happened. He had swallowed all that blood till we got home. Mom got a cold wash cloth and held it over his tongue till it stopped bleeding. I think Mom took him to the doctor, because it was such a bad cut. From what I can remember, Doc could not use stitches, because it was such a soft tissue. He said it would not close but it would heal. He always had that cut showing every time he stuck his tongue out.
We had a horse called Cody at Swenson. Tom and I would take turns just sitting on him and pretending, playing Cowboys and Indians. We had to climb up on the hay trailer just to get on Cody’s back. Cody was a very gentle horse. He was blond with dark mane and tail. I think we got him when he was 2 years old. Cody lived to be 21 years old until Daddy had Uncle Charlie to sell him at the auction. I have no proof of that but it was the time Daddy needed money. We were living on Sumac on the Acuff road just outside the city limits of Lubbock, Tx. At least Cody was 21 when we last had him. Tom and I would come in from school, saddle the horses; by that time we had several horses. We had Chico, a pinto, Lady, a paint Shetland , Buck, a buckskin, Goldie, a big horse that like to rear up; don’t know what kind. We had Breezy, a colt that no one rode. Breezy was a colt from Dollie, a mustang who became wild later.We also had Joe, a grey and white appaloosa, along with Cody. We had a small Shetland that David loved to ride at 216 North Mulberry street in east Lubbock. His name was Coaly, because he was all black But he had to be put down because of a cancerous tumor on his nose. That was a sad time. Daddy rented a pasture in Spur, Texas from Janell and Kenneth Stoneman who were Mom’s cousins and thats where we kept our horses during the winter and part summer. They loved roaming free and getting fat. We sometimes would spend a weekend camping in the pasture just to check on them and I think we may have had a few cows. It was lots of fun; good memories.
I had wonderful childhood days and wouldn’t change anything. I had the best times, cause I had the best four brothers and one sister.
Tom’s first paying job was painting a cattle guard at Paducah. Mr. Worley paid Tom and me to paint it. We painted it silver. Daddy worked for Mr.Worley at Paducah, Texas. Jenk told me the other day that he remembered helping Daddy put in a cattle guard. Daddy told Tom to jump in the truck and back it up to the hole. Tom was all excited about getting to back the truck up. Jenk said I don’t know why Daddy asked him to do that. I think Tom was about 9 maybe 10 years old. Jenk said that Tom backed it up but got too close to the hole and the truck’s back wheels dropped down in the cattle guard hole.
Daddy never got mad about it; Daddy and Jenk got a neighbor to come down with their wrench truck and lifted the back wheels up and pushed the truck forward to get it out of the hole.
It was at Paducah that Jenk, Tom, Dave, Henry and I carried irrigation pipe out in the field. I was always outside with the boys doing things. Linda, my sister, did not like being outside. One day when the boys were out working and carrying irrigation pipe, Tom suddenly dropped his jeans and came out of them. He had matches in his pocket and they struck against each other and lit. Tom’s pocket was getting very hot so he had to come out of them. He was about 9/10 years old.
Tom always liked to play practical jokes. When we lived at Swenson, We had an old RCA television that did not get a good picture, but we watched it anyway. Every Saturday morning I would always get up to watch The Roy Rogers Show. We had a wash pan setting on the washstand in the kitchen. Every morning I would get up to wash my face and my hands. Tom said on a Friday night “ Im going to put this mouse trap right here under this washstand so when you get up in the morning I will catch your big toe.” I said “Aww , Tom I’ll know its there.”
Tom said, “You won’t remember”. Well, I’ll be dang, if he wasn’t right. I got up like I always did and stood there to wash my face and hands and I was barefoot too. That mouse trapped snapped across my big toe and it did hurt. I yelled out at Tom and he was laughing and he said “I told you I’d catch you.” Afterwards, I just had to laugh about it myself. Another time was when we were working on the Sumac house. Daddy was trying to get it leveled. Daddy had Tom and Jenk under the house setting cinder blocks. Jenk had come out from under the house and was talking to Tom in the back bedroom yelling down to Tom. I guess, they were trying to get the blocks in the right position under the house. Jenk was talking to Tom, then Tom yelled out a big yell like he was hurt. Scared the “dickens” out of me. Jenk called out to him , but Tom didn’t answer. Jenk went flying out of the house yelling for Tom. Tom started laughing so hard that it made Jenk mad. He chewed him out for doing that.
Jenk and Tom liked playing chess. They played long hours, sometimes late in the night. Many times, we left them playing when the rest of us went to bed. Tom could beat Jenk in chess, but Jenk could hold his own and beat Tom too. I never could beat Tom in chess, no matter how hard I tried. He would get so tired of playing me and would say, “Carolyn, I’ve already played 5 games and I don’t want to play anymore”. I was never a challenge for him in chess, but Jenk was. I would get so aggravated that I couldn’t beat him. So I just gave up. Tom would have more arguments, disagreements, and fist fights with Jenk than any of the other boys. Mom would have to separate them, both would come out with bloody lips. But as time went on, they each went their way to cut out a life for themselves.
Tom and I were only two years apart. He was not interested in playing any sports in school, but would play ball with the boys just for fun at home. He liked to talk about being self sufficient, using solar energy and new technology that was coming. He wondered about space and what could be in the future. He was interested in reading documentaries about President Kennedy’s assassination and what really happened, even though our government says it happened one way, many people disagree and say there were other shooters. He wondered about a shadow government that was running our country, instead of what we saw out front. Tom talked about UFOs and if they were real or not. He read the Bible and wondered about who the giants were and how old the earth was and when the dinosaurs roamed the earth. He wondered about who made the pyramids and how large carvings of animals on the earth could only be seen from the air. He wondered about how large boulders were lifted thousands of years ago to build huge structures without machinery. He wondered about how such laser like cuttings could be made to build Stonehinge in Wiltshire, England when there was no such thing. He wondered about Easter Island which is on a Chilean Island in the southeastern Pacific Ocean and how the stones came to be placed where they are today. He wondered if there was a society that was highly technical that lived thousands of years ago and was suddenly destroyed for some reason. Today, some scientists are saying that could be very well possible.
Tom was very intelligent and saw possibilities. I learned from Tom about the Hybrid Prius cars that were being tested for the highway in order to conserve energy. Today I’m driving a hybrid Prius and it gets 48 mpg sometimes 52 mpg on the freeway and 35/42 in town.
He told me at one time when we were living at Paducah that someday we would be watching television that was only two inches wide. Today, people are watching videos and programs on their iphone that Tom never had a chance to see. The iphone was first released in 2007 and very expensive. Iphones today have advanced technically since then and can do so much more. Today iphones have replaced the clocks, maps, calendars, email, encyclopedias, compass, calculator, camera, bible. There was so much more about Tom, that made Tom who he was. So much more that I can explain or that anybody will ever know. Tom was unique and curious and always, always thought of “what if”. Tom loved to drink Root Beer and he knowing I did not like root beer was always blowing in my face. Many times he got slugged for doing that, but he would just laugh about it. Also, Tom was very careful what he ate. He had read about how foods with nitrates were very bad for you and told me to not buy processed meat, only the real meat. He also said never buy any cheese products marked cheese food. He said it was nothing but chemicals. He said to eat the real cheeses even if it cost more. Today, I only buy the real cheese and I don’t eat processed meats. Although, sometimes I have to buy wieners for a hotdog, but always beef.
Tom’s first job was working at Piggly Wiggly grocery store in Lubbock, Texas as a sacker. He then got moved into the backroom as a stocker and unloading trucks. After a few years he changed jobs to work for Safeway Grocery store on 34 th and University in Lubbock,Tx. and was later promoted to Assistant Manager.
Tom was going to Texas Tech and working at Safeway grocery store as Assistant Manager when he got hurt. He never got to go back to Tech to finish his schooling. It was Christmas Eve in 1975 while we were living on Sumac street in Lubbock, Texas. Tom was closing the store that night. All customers had cleared out, but one who was at the checkout line. Tom was in the backroom checking everything when he heard a noise behind him. He remembered turning around and was hit in the mouth with the butt of a gun. Falling to the floor, he tried to get up, but was hit again on the back of his head. He again tried getting up, but was hit again, He said he guess he blacked out, cause the next thing he remembered was being dragged by his belt further back in the store. He didn’t know how long he had laid there but woke up and was afraid to raise up again, so he just laid there for awhile till he didn’t hear anything for a long time. When he got up, he managed to make it to the front, where Welcome, co-worker, saw Tom, and ran to him. Tom collapsed in his arms. Welcome and the customer put Tom in the customer’s car and drove him to Saint Mary’s Hospital, which is now called Covenant Lakeside Hospital. Welcome thought Tom had fallen.
Hospital doctor called and told Mom that Tom had an accident and was in the emergency room, but it was not bad. Daddy and Mom went to the hospital. Mom was upset with doctor, cause he said it was not bad, but Mom found that it was much worse. It was hours before we heard anything about Tom. Finally, Daddy called and said Tom was in surgery and we wouldn’t know anything till later. Linda, Henry, David and I were on pins and needles at home wanting to know something. Finally, after a few hours, Henry said, I’m not waiting around anymore, I’m going to the hospital. We all piled into his red truck and got there to see the waiting room was full. I thought, oh my, there is a lot of people here. Found out later they were all there for Tom. Tom’s co-workers, Lee Owens, Rick Hanna, Terry Wilhite, Neighbor Castro, Ronnie Wheeler, Dick Austin, the store manager, and others that I can’t remember. The police had been called after talking to Tom to find out what happened.
Tom told the nurse that a “big man with greasy hair “ hit him in the mouth. The nurse noticed that Tom was clinching his fist and wouldn’t open it. She finally got Tom to release his fist and when he did he was holding his 2 front teeth. He had his glasses in the other hand. The nurse asked Tom again what happened and Tom told her the same story, She walked away from him and came back and asked again what happened. Tom, again, told her the same story. That’s when she went over and picked up the phone and called the police. When Linda, Henry, David, and I got to the hospital Tom was still in surgery. After a few hours, Tom went to ICU. We got to see him around 5:00 A.M. When I saw him, his head was all bandaged. I could only see his lips that was so very swollen and his eyes that were swollen. He really didn’t look like Tom. He was unrecognizable to me, because his face was so very swollen. His co-workers did not leave the hospital till Tom come out of surgery. He was in the hospital for 3 months after going through a second surgery from an infection.
We each took turns staying with him during the day and at night. At one point he wanted everybody to go home at night, but after having a big man wearing large tools come in to fix the call bell, he didn’t want to be left alone. Linda and June Garland, a cousin, were there that night when he came in and leaned over Tom, but June said Tom did not react to him. One reason, Tom can’t see without his glasses. June and Linda both described him as being big and with greasy hair. June called the nurses station to check if they sent a call bell repairman; they had not. The next night, Linda and June pushed a chair against the door to Tom’s room to keep anybody from walking in at night. A few nights later somebody pushed on the door trying to get in and June called out “Who is it?’ Nobody answered so June called nurses’ desk and asked if anybody had been sent to Tom’s room and no one had. From then on Tom had a security guard posted outside his door. Tom finally came home with head bandaged for many months after and had to go through salt soaks to the back of his head daily. Doctor wanted to put a plate in his head for protection, because his skull had a hole where his skull broke into splinters. But Tom said he did not want to go through another surgery and Mom was not going to force him. She left it up to him if he wanted it and he did not. After about 8-10 months or more, Tom went back to work. But Tom could not work at that store anymore. He was too scared. The police never caught the guy, so he was still out there. Tom was transferred to a Safeway in Hereford, Texas. He was there for a time sleeping on the floor next to his bedroom door with his 4-10 rifle. He had nightmares and couldn’t sleep. All Safeway stores in Texas closed after about a year, because employees voted to go Union. Tom then got an interview to work at Homeland Grocery in Arkansas, Kansas (Ark City). He was on his way up there when his truck broke down at Hollis, Texas. He had to make that interview so he bought a van for $300 that had been gutted and no floorboard on passenger side. He made it to his interview and got the job as Assistant Manager. Jenk happened to be in Texas and drove to Hollis to help him get his truck. While he was in Arkansas City, he heard that a delivery man for Safeway had been arrested for knifing a guy. Tom knew him and described him as being a big man with greasy hair. The man was sent to prison, but I can not remember his name. Mom got several phone calls from a man that said he was a friend of Tom's and wanted to know where Tom was working now. This was about the time Tom moved to Hereford, Texas. But Mom never told him and told us to never say the location of Tom. Tom worked in Arkansas City for a few years and later he ended up in Ponca City, Oklahoma as Manager of Discount Foods. He met Terrie Ann Jones who was an employee at the store. They were married June 29, 1991 in Ponca City, Oklahoma. He had a dog named Dexter and that dog loved Tom, now Tom was not a dog lover and could not understand why Dexter loved him so much, but I think Tom loved him a little. Dexter would sit at the front door about the time Tom was to come home from work.
Tom would take Dexter on many walks. Dexter loved to go on walks with Tom. Tom never drank, smoked nor used bad language. He enjoyed working on computers but never had the chance to enjoy them because they kept breaking down. It was because of Tom, that made us all interested in getting a computer.
He enjoyed listening to his Police Radio. When he was late coming home from work, Terrie would call him and he would be at the library reading or he would be at Hastings Bookstore reading a Popular Mechanics magazine. Terrie would say, “ Thomas, time to come home”, She would call him Thomas ever now and then. He bought his first house and paid cash ($11,000) in Ponca City. He did not want to have any house payment.
He always wanted to own a business but never could get ahead enough to have sufficient money to do that. He would just roll with the punches and kept going. He began buying into Savings Bonds when he worked for Safeway. He saved his money. He always got a giggle of pushing out his front teeth at Carly who was his niece (Henry’s daughter). After he was injured, he wore a partial denture to replace his two front teeth. He was always teasing his nieces and nephews. We have a good picture of Tom holding Carly. Tom was hard working and was willing to help anybody. He would do all he could for anyone, but when he said no, he meant no. Because he had bad eyes, he read that having laser surgery could improve eyesight, but Tom didn’t get a chance to have laser surgery. He would say, maybe I can get it done later. He just could never could get ahead.
All of his co-workers and employees thought a lot of Tom. He made the best with what he had. He loved to play Darts. In fact, he was on a Dart Team at the store and they would have Dart Tournaments. He won a few competitions and loved being around other people. Tom had lots of friends. Tom always enjoyed life and said he didn’t have time to worry about anything. His philosophy was the same as Jenk's, “ It is what it is”. But, if anybody did Tom wrong, he was done with you. Tom passed away September 26, 2009 in Ponca City while he was at work of a brain aneurysm. We always thought it was caused by his injury he sustained to his head. He was laid to rest at Memorial Lawn Cemetery in Arkansas City, Kansas. He was only 57 years old. Rest in peace, Tom. We will see you soon. I will always love you and miss you everyday.
Your sister, Carolyn